In my journey for the best relationship advice, I’ve been chatting with couples who have been happily married themselves for over 25 years. Who would know better than people who have done it themselves, right?!? These lovely couples have given me a glimpse into what has (and has not) worked in their own quest for a satisfying love life. Today I’m sharing the themes that emerged from their sage wisdom with the top 10 tips for a happy marriage!
Top 10 Pieces of Relationship Advice from happily married couples
#1. Set your expectations realistically. Marriage will always have ups and downs and there is no such thing as a perfect marriage. It can be hard to imagine it’s possible fall in and out of love, especially during the early phases of a relationship when both partners are still feeling infatuation. Couples must understand how relationships change over time and not assume ‘something is wrong’ when they enter a new stage. Similar to this, they should be forewarned that children almost universally put a strain on marriages. Couples wanting a family they should be ready for some serious highs and lows! I do wish someone had given me this piece of advice at the beginning of my own relationship as I wasn’t expecting everything we encountered.
#2. Master the basics early on. Money, household chores, shared responsibilities, and other functional aspects of sharing a life together aren’t always fun. Unfortunately, these monotonous and stressful day to day tasks can quickly crowd out the romantic aspect of any relationship. These are almost always the first areas of contention within a relationship, beware! If you can work out these areas before they are actually problems, you will be happier much longer.
#3. Prioritize the couple. Don’t take your partner for granted and continuously seek opportunities to deepen and grow your connection. This means date nights are essential and making time for just the two of you. It can be hard to prioritize the couple especially when there are young children that are part of the family. If this is the case, keep in mind that doing this will benefit your entire family in the long run.
#4. Accept your partner for who they are. Although you can both try to improve habits, you shouldn’t try to change your partner. Trying to change your partner will only lead to frustration and resentment when it doesn’t happen. Remind yourself that you accepted this person as a whole, all strengths and flaws when you decided to marry them. Them remind yourself what those strengths are! It can be really helpful to try to see your partner with fresh eyes if you struggling to remember what you loved about them in the first place. Similarly, don’t expect perfection from each other because it only sets you up for failure.
#5. Always choose being happy over being right. There are many things that aren’t worth fighting over, but our pride makes us feel we need to be right. Surrender to this feeling and begin to let things go. Your relationship will be much better when you realize that being right is not as satisfying as enjoying each other. Maintaining harmony is sorely underrated.
#6. Be grateful to each other. Say thank you for little things and don’t take each other for granted. As time passes, Couples can forget to acknowledge the everyday sacrifices each partner does for each other. Everyone wants to be appreciated and loved, so make sure your partner hears it from you on a regular basis! A little love on a regular basis goes a long way.
#7. Nurture yourself. It’s a bit of a cliche but certainly true that you can’t take care of someone else until you take care of yourself! Eat well, get enough sleep, exercise, and do what you love! Food for the soul is food for your relationship because a happy partner is a good partner.
#8. Invest time and energy into making your relationship better. Don’t be a passive partner, be proactive and seek ways to improve your relationship because the good times you have will help carry you through the tougher times. This means seeking out ways to connect, grow together care for each other, and have as much great sex as you can!
#9. Surround yourself with supportive individuals. Although it can be tempting, try not to speak unkindly about your partner with other people. Have respect for your partner and keep friends with people who do the same with their partners. Seek advice only from people who are supportive of your relationship and are happy in their own relationships. Research shows that spending time with people in unhappy relationships influences your own relationship .
#10. Don’t give up. Getting through hard times will require individual growth, which can be very challenging, but also very rewarding. Sometimes it is be easier to face an issue when you’ve taken the idea of divorce off the table completely. When you don’t have a way out, you must look inward for change. And because most issues are actually our own issues, they will arise again and again. It might seem easier to walk away but history repeats itself in relationships. You are sure to run into the same problems in the future if you don’t address them now.
If you have relationship advice you’d like to share we would love to hear your words of wisdom! Drop us a line and we will add your thoughts to our relationship advice list!!
